I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
