K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
