Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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