what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I got her a Nickelback box set.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize
