In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I am mentally ready for anal.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
