I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize
