you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
