This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
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