i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize
