Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
