How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
barbara walters just said penis...
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
