Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Randomize
