I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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