NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize