how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
