if i can run in heels then i can drive
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize