The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
