Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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