Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
