Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
