My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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