Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
