He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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