I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I am one with the molecules
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
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