Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Randomize
