A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
