I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
