Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
...so i touched it.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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