apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Randomize
