He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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