what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize