Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Let's get the cat blown out
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
