Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
We talked him into tasing himself.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
