Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
