so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I have already put on my inside pants.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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