Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
