What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
