Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
