I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
