ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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