i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Randomize