if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize
