Kiss
Puke
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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