the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
