And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
