I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
