we need to drink 2009 down the drain
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
