just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
