oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
