i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
