What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize